Running Away

2006-12-17T02:29:00.000+08:00

[mood] hack la
[listening] love story - fan yi chen
[doing] nothing
[thinking] -

ppl have been bugging me for D&D.....
but i simple DUN WANT TO GO.....
quoting fr KC:
"aiya, tt time u also say wun go mawai, but in the end also go......"
so this time i shall say it and mean it.....
not going means not going......
not going for D&D.....
not going for graduation ceremony......
poor ppl is not suited to attend big functions.....

my work schedule have some changes le.....
now i have to be at 3 kumon centres instead of 2......
this is the updated one......(highly subjected to changes)

Mon
9:30am to 1pm = bb st 31 kumon
2pm to 6pm = woodlands admiralty place kumon
7pm to 9:30pm = bb st 31 kumon

Tues
9:30am to 12pm = woodlands admiralty place kumon (not comfirmed)
2pm to 9:30pm = bb st 31 kumon

Wed
afternoon = private
5:30pm to 10pm = pasir ris st 51 kumon

Thurs
2pm to 10pm = pasir ris st 51 kumon

Fri
evening = private

Sat
9:30am to 6pm = bukit batok st 31 kumon

Sun
12pm to 6pm = bukit batok st 31 kumon

packed huh?
but my pay is accumalating...
and i dun have to contribute cpf.....
haha....
means more cash.....

wells.....
ct is coming....
so?
me shall start studying the day before it......
can pass can le......
dun care abt the rest.....
me more excited abt the lab tour aft the ct.....
haha.....

*yawn*
life really sux sometimes

PS: Superstar rox.....Carrie jia you!!! win the fan shen zhan and be back into the competition soon.....le sheng is so shuai man....haha...i m crazy sia......

2006-12-06T22:00:00.000+08:00

[mood] -
[listening] Number one - project superstar II
[doing] work
[thinking] -

it had been so long since i blogged.....

i have found my job!!!
wells i am leaving lab med loh.....
finally.....
will let u all noe the details later.....

micro test is 2 days down the road....
i haven study yet....
i think i have given up le...
it looks like i am failing this sem.....
shrugs....

gotten back my actual result for sem 1 few days ago.....
simply got a D in everything.....
juz as well......
it makes me more determined to give up......
D then let it be ba......

i still have no wish to go for the D and D.....
i have no wish to act in the drama.....
i dun feel like i am in tt course.....
and i dun feel like i am going to graduate.....
no money to be pretty also....
so y go?

everything juz sux.....

2006-11-04T00:51:00.000+08:00

[mood] sianz
[listening] wo shui ye bu gai - sweety
[doing] msn
[thinking] some probs

attachment starts at nuh....

i was at haem at the end of oct....
it was difficult but fun....
running cntrls and comparison studies.....
learning how to read fbc and scattergram....
and finding out tt haem staff are actually very friendly....
haha....wells.....
now pearly is my friend and not some fierce teacher i noe last yr.....
i din noe i could chat and joke with her.....
oh wells....she is juz so nice.....
the results of haem test will be out soon....
i hope i din do badly for it....

now i am at bts....
and my nice nice teacher is julie.....
yar....she is very patient with us.....
and teaches us alot....
the addition of ABID and phenotyping makes me real stress....
and during the wet run today....
i cannot finish on time lor....
and made a few mistakes.....
first in abs....i forgot to add LIS....
forgot to do check cells.....
then ABID some neg result i see as pos.....
all the incubation time also wrong....
cos i totally lost track of the time....
haiz....
and aft the whole run.....
i was so tired, so stressed and so fed up.....
then i keep very quiet....
until winson and kl ask y i so quiet...
julie also say y i so quiet and ask me not to be stress.....
haiz....i m juz worried wat if this is the exam.....
and today's wet run did not include weak D lor....
anyway it is over.....
i hope the exam wun be tt bad.....

bts is the onli place tt i get to do things fr the start of the day to the end of the day.....
and the staff are all so nice.....
of cos my lovely teachers py and julie....
they make my stay there so enjoyable....
i simply love it there.....

upcoming events
- ward round with doc (wed)
- bts practice (wed)
- parliament visit (wed)
- some stupid mindef tok at np (tues)
- bts pract test (fri)

2006-10-19T23:51:00.000+08:00

[mood] super high....hahaha....
[listening] tian tian quan - sweety
[doing] have to do my haem hw later....sianz
[thinking] today's presentation

haha...so long nvr blog le.....
all becos of the fyp presentation which kept me really really busy.....
i will come to tt later....
this time will be a really long update....

let start fr the congress.....
it was very boring for me.....
but was impressed to see so much chim proj going on....
2nd day was sick,so i din attend......

the mawai camp was really great....
the first day we took the bus fr sch to malaysia.....
then took a boat into the campsite.....

we were required to build our own bed.....
tt was so tiring lor.....
then we went to the swamp walk....
which was like yeeeeewwwww.....
my leg was like in a mud bath.....
haha.....
and i saw all the leeches....yuck....
i also eat some grasses.....
yes grasses......
and they taste real bad.....
then when we came back.....
we had to bath in the super 'full of plant and bug' toilet....

then we had our dinner....

which i have to wash my own plates own fork and spoon.....
and aft dinner, my table at my table came out with a rule....
haha....we play 'open number' and huever kana would have to wash the dishes......
and guess wat....i kana during the first night....lol.....
but subsequent night i dun have to do it anymore.....hehe....
then we went to see fireflies.....
it was like waoh......so nice lor!
and in the middle of the cruise, we had a "silent" 5 mins which make everyone wants to slp.....
haha.....

then we went to bed aft tt.....
the bad was super cosy!!!

day 2 was terrible.....
we went treking.....
my class were sorted out according to 'experience and speed'....
with me lacking both the properties, i was the first one with ron in front of me guiding the class....
aft climbing for abt 15 to 20 min,
yes....aft ONLI 15 to 20 min.....
i was super tired.....but i could not stop cos the whole class is like behind me.....
i was so tired tt i started crying.....
ron was like so shocked.....haha....
then i was 'passed' to vanessa....
my bag was passed to ah boon.....
and within a few mins....i became the last girl!!!
lol....was still crying my way up.....
until i reach the peak.....
i din even eat my lunch cos i dun have any apettite.....
down the mountain is much more easier.....
except tt my big toe hurts.....
and fr the peak.....the view is like so nice lor.....

then we reach the south china sea.....

it was super nice man....
played with water and picked sea shells.....
haha.....and stroll back to the bus after tt.....
Special thanks to all my nice classmates tt "coax" me up and down the mountain!!!
especially......
>ron
>vanessa
>winson
>hazel
then we went back for a bath and dinner......
aft dinner i was so tired tt i went to bed.....
but aft tt i was woken up agn in less then 5 mins......
cos got campfire.....i was like so tired and pek chek lor.....

but nvm....the campfire was nice.....
was chosen to go up and play a super lousy game....
with alicia and anna.....(triple a's)
and we lost to the juniors.....
we also acted out a skit which comprises the snapshots of BLT16....
it brought back so much nice memories.....
1st day of sch, NUH labs, polyclinics, congress, camp
aft tt we had supper.....
and i had a really nice and long chat with the juniors.....
they were so like me when i first enter nuh lor....
haha....

the last day was the water obstacles.....

it was damn fun!!!
i did all the obstacles the first round being dry at the end!!!
haha....but was sabo by kc later and drop into the pond.....
but the pond was damn cooling lor......
the best of all is the asli bridge.....
when ron me and feliz helped each other cross the super difficult single-log bridge....
and we three are the first grp tt completed it dry!!!
haha.....
aft tt, we had a bath and clear up the campsite, cleaning up the longhouse, toilets and help the juniors pack up so tt they have time for lunch....
then off we go!!! back to singapore.....

this is juz some snapshots of the camp....
there is simply too much memories at the camp.....

the next few days were all spent doing the fyp report n presentation.....
it was busy busy and busy....
and yesterday,
me,yx,ky and ron even stayed at the lecture hall up to 9.30pm+++
although we were all tired,we had lots of fun chatting during dinner.....
and of cos, help each other by commenting on the proj presentation n "throwing" qns when the other grp was presenting to prepare each other for the Q&A....

Today was the actually fyp presentation.....

everyone was nervous.....
but it went pretty well......
except for some....
or mayb alot......of complains abt biasness.....
as we know.....
my class onli have 1 human and the other were all ghosts.....
so kan kai yi dian la....she cannot see us ma.....
aft all the presentations,during the break.....

i took some photos with my class ppl.....

and my cute little juniors.....
haha.....but most of them is using sk's cam.....
juz hope tt she would send us the photos.....
*pray really hard*
i want the photos!!!

the proj was finally over!!!
phew.....going to rest at hm tml and sat.....
and prepare to chiong for final sem.....
and mayb start studying for my haem pract test tml night.....

oh ya.....forgot one thing.....
i passed my lvl L test for kumon maths!!!
wohooo.....and now i am at lvl M (uni lvl).....
haha.....

kk...tt is all for today.....have to do my haem assignment now.....

*upcoming events
-blood donation on 26 oct
-IM haem
-IS small and major proj
-boring lects
-haem pract test nxt fri

2006-09-20T23:36:00.000+08:00

[mood] angry
[listening] fei xing bu luo - fir
[doing] work
[thinking] grrr.....

i m broke.....
YES I M BROKE.......
all thanks to those hu borrow my things......
esp $$$......
and nvr return it on time......
grrr.......

to huever is out there hu borrowed my things but nvr return it.......
esp the one tt borrowed $350 fr me......
i dun care hu u r......
u betta return it to me soon......
or else u will have ur retribution......

i am into deep shit trouble......
the stupid congress thingy.....
i dun care.....
if i dun get my clothes on time.....
i am not going for it......
let sk fail my proj.....
i dun care......
i m not going to be in biomed field anyway.....
she can do watever she wants.....

nvr believe anyone ard u......or else u will be the one tt is hurt in the end.....
*retribution*

2006-09-19T00:55:00.000+08:00

[mood] tired
[listening] kiss gdbye - wang li hong
[doing] work
[thinking] nxt sem

my results are out for this sem......

chem - C
micro - D
haem - B (surprisingly)
geno and proteo - C
GPA : 2.00

hmm......not too good but still passed.....
din expect haem to be so good.....
others were getting Cs for it......
GP was also quite surprising....
expecting a D but got a C instead....
anyway.....
it is over.....
thank God tt i passed it.....

nxt sem timetable was out......
wed have to go back to np.....
for bioinformatics and world's perspective......
it was quite stupid to have our bioinfo class in a lecture hall when there is onli 20 of us......
haha......
and our WP lecturer is koh tse yuan.......
woohoo......
he is nice man......

nxt sem got all kinds of rubbish modules to clear.....
sianz......
class is getting boring......
*yawn*

2006-09-12T22:58:00.000+08:00

[mood] so so
[listening] hua yan qiao yu - sweety
[doing] trying to do my proj
[thinking] work

my hols was not a hol at all......
have to be back at mdc almost everyday.....
this wk is my attachment at mdc.....
it was so fun lor.....
so fun as in my grp keep on chatting and chatting......
cos we have nothing to do.....
haha......
then we talk abt a lot of things.....
ron also tell us abt uni things......
kelvin as usual.....lame jokes.....
haha....
we had so much fun together......

but all the demos are soooo boring.....
everyone wants to slp lor.....
sianz.....

dr zhang is so nice to help us do the poster......
he say he wants us to focus on our report.......
so he did the poster for us.....
oh.....thinking of the report......
sianz.....i haven started on it yet....
haiz......

my stupid lappy is down agn.....
argh.....
it always break down at the time when i wanna do my report.....
stupid......

2006-08-26T23:54:00.000+08:00

[mood] ok
[listening] ni zhui yong gan - twins
[doing] work
[thinking] something

ok.....
finally the exam was over.....
not very optimistic abt the results.....
but wells....
at least it is over.....

the chem paper was very easy.....
thankfully....
the haem was ok to me but a lot of my class ppl said it was difficult.....
so hmm......nvm......
the micro was the worst.....
grrr....

wasn't feeling very well these few days.....
not enuf slp and the exam.....
plus some ppl hu make me blow my top at.....
haiz.....

tml still have work and class......
sianz.....

2006-08-20T02:24:00.000+08:00

[mood] ok
[listening] du chang qing ge - selina & tank
[doing] mugging
[thinking] mon paper

i think yesterdays paper really affects me alot.....
wanted to start studying early in the morn.....
but somehow.....
i decide not to....

spent my day at work today.....
and planned to go shopping with izyan and nora on 2nd sept.....
when i got my pay......
woohoo.....i can't wait for tt day to come!

now is 2 something in the morning......
and i finally started mugging.....
started to have a little sense of urgency......

tml will be a long day for me......

i hope mon everything will be fine.....

2006-08-19T00:52:00.000+08:00

[mood] sad
[listening] wo men zen me le - she
[doing] listening to songs
[thinking] haiz

today's paper was horrible......
and i felt even worse when i recieve my test results......
i expect myself to fail.....
but not so badly.....
16.5 out of 60.....
haiz.....

i really feel like crying when i was outside the exam hall......
i was nvr so scared for the exam before......
when i recieve my test paper, my mind juz went blank......
thinking of how i score in my test.....
i knew i am going to fail it......
i really dunno wat to do now......
i din know wat happen in the exam hall......
i m juz trying hard to squeeze my empty brain......
i was controling my tears thoughout the paper......
i juz hope i wouldn't cry......

aft the paper i went home.....
feeling really down.....
ppl were saying how easy the paper was.....
my mind was blank......
thinking back.....
i could do nothing but cry.....

on my way home.....
i stop by the coffee shop to have bak kut teh.....
the i bought bread, egg tart, cake, bubble tea.....
my appetite had been really bad.....
but all thanks to the really bad mood i am having......
i stuffed myself up with food....
and the consequence is.....
now i m having gastric probs......
i hope i can juz die fr it or wat......

* my heart hurts, my head hurts, my stomach hurts *

2006-08-17T02:12:00.000+08:00

[mood] extremely down
[listening] ying hua cao - sweety
[doing] studying
[thinking] haiz

was toking to my friend on the phone juz now.....
aft she hung up....
my mum ask me abt my decision on whether or not to go uni.....
i told her more or less not going already....
i have too much to handle if i am going.....
she ask me if i were to regret and hate her for this......
i cried.....
i blaff her i wun.....
but.....i was thinking....
i had nobody to blame for this right?
i can onli blame myself.....
i knew i will regret it.....
but do i really have the choice?
can i hate her?
can i hate her for being my mum?
can i hate my family for being poor?

suddenly i feel tt i am studying so as pass my exams.....
i am studying for the sake of passing it.....
for the cert tt states ' dip in blt'.....
studying has nvr been so tiring.....
dreams are always dreams.....
the reality is always cruel.....
reality shatters dreams, dosen it?

fri will be exam.....
and i still have no clue abt the things i am studying......
i m tired.....hu's going to help me?

*hurt*

2006-08-16T00:17:00.000+08:00

[mood] weird, a bit down mayb.....
[listening] hua yan qiao yu - sweety
[doing] going to slp soon
[thinking] abt my paper

went back to bbk yesterday and today to cover zhixiu....
yesterday din have much of pts.....
but a stupid pt scolded me.....
hmph....he big la....i got nothing to say.....
not going to tok abt it.....
it make my blood boil....

today was very very very busy.......
i have nvr drawn so much bld in my entire life.....
i literally drawn non stop for 3 and a half hours!
so tired sia.....

but still.....something made me not quite happy today.......
but nvm.....i am not attached to bbk anymore......
oh ya....
thanks ivy, it was nice helping u at the counter......

i have kind of decide on not going to uni le.....
i facing all kinds of prob if i really go.....
so irritating......
mayb i am not destined to go ba.....
a dream will always be a dream.....
dreams are expensive.......
although i m very disappointed.....
but wells,this is life,izzen it?

i recieve my report on my lipid panel....
everything was fine......
and i got extremely high HDL......
kind of hoping tt i got some high cholestrol or wat.....
which give me a reason to be on a diet.....
and to worry abt my health.....
or mayb die fr it or wat....
but ya......everything is fine......

exam is starting in 2 days time......
i m very very not confident abt the first paper.....
which is genomics and proteomics.....
i feel so lost on how to go about studying it.....
and chem also.....
i have this feeling tt i am going to fail......
somehow.....
now i am absolutely deprived of confidence.....
have never been so.....
i dunno how to descibe the feeling.....
it juz feel so weird.....
i m not feeling too well.....

2006-08-09T01:13:00.000+08:00

[mood] haiz
[listening] hua dou kai hao le - she
[doing] rotting
[thinking] hmm....

women are fickle-minded.....
ya.....and tt is wat i am....
haha.....

had an RMIT tok yesterday......
and it made me think of studying in uni!
oh no.....
i tot i have decide not to go uni.....
but somehow.....
haiz....
oh mayb i haven gave up the tot.....
i told my mum....
but....
she said no....
she say i have to work to sponsor my sis......
but i really wanna go uni.....
y is God so unfair?
those hu are rich keep complaining tt they have to study and study.....
those hu are poor are not allowed to study too much.....
money money and money.....
y izzit money everytime?
can someone juz make me gave up the tot of going to uni?
the feeling of u wanna do something but u are not allowed to do is very irritating......
arhhh.....
fustrated......

i have cleared my tutorials yesterday......
finally i can rest now.....
and study hard for my exam......

*the tot of uni still haunt me*

2006-08-04T23:14:00.000+08:00

[mood] sad
[listening] li ren jie - jolin
[doing] work
[thinking] bbk polyclinic

tian xia mei you bu san zhi yan xi......

today is my last day at bbk polyclinic.....
so sad to leave there.....
a lot of wonderful memories......
Sharon and Zhixiu calling me "Abu"....
auntie sharon's nagging....
gladys's 'bullying'......
chatting with kim during lunch.....
ivy teaching me patiently on how to use labo and pmpa to order test and comfirm service.....
cleaning the tables every 12pm and 4pm......
doing ecg which i once hated most.....but misses it now.....
so much memories.....

some words to me by them.....
Gladys: ping guo xiao jie....muz study hard ok?
Sharon: Take care hor....
Ivy: Thanks.....
Kim: *hug* take care dearie....muz come back to visit us if u r free.....
Wai theng: take care.....
( Zhixiu was on urgent leave)

i wanted to stay a little later......
but i couldn't control my tears any longer.....
so i left quite hurriedly.....
was controling my tears on my way to sch.....

Maybe happiness dosen stay......
All the best to each and everyone at BBK polyclinic......
May God bless them always.....
they may forget me years down the road but i will nvr forget them ever in my life......
this will always be the best attachment i have in BLT.....
Always.......

2006-07-29T23:36:00.000+08:00

[mood] hmph
[listening] yin xing de chi pang - zhang shao han
[doing] work...wat else?
[thinking] %^#&%*^&$*

i am on leave today....
suppose to sos at bbk....
but it seems tt they have worked it out....
so i was rotting at home....

went to bbk at 11 plus....
to chat with them and help out at the counter....
aft tt me and zhixiu went for lunch at west mall....

then i went home and become unproductive....
yar....was watching tv without being kan jiong with all my undone report.....
yes! tt is hu i am....
i have not started any report.....
let's see how i am going to screw it up.....

i am beginning to change my views abt ppl ard me.....
so wat are frenz?
even ppl whom i noe for onli 2,3 wks can treat me better than my so called frenz.....
i am starting to hate sch......
i think i love working more than anything.....
fr today's incident.....
i shall decide to take on another part time.....
me shall tok to auntie sharon nxt wk.....
i shall make sure i spent more time at work then study.....
mayb i will be happier tt way.....

Thanks ron for doing me a great favour! :)

so......
nvr believe in frenz.....

2006-07-24T23:22:00.000+08:00

[mood] hmm....
[listening] ma de li bu si yi - jolin
[doing] ???
[thinking] ???

feeling kinda weird nowadays.....
dunno y....juz weird.....
juz feel tt smthg is not right....
am i nuts?

mayb i am nuts ba.....
exam coming....
should i study?
i got so many things to do....
and yet i feel so lost....
wat to do nxt?
wat to start with?
and the prob is....
i am not kan jiong at all!!!
*confused*

ok...enuf of tt....
i have decide to go donate bld on wed.....
looking for a company but....
some say they not heavy enuf.....
low hb....
no vein....
not free.....
still got one even say he will faint!!!
haiz....forget it.....
i am used to being alone anyway.....
mayb i juz dun need others.....

abt working in polyclinic....
i kind of decide already.....
shall tok to my auntie sharon if i had the chance tml.....
this kind of things it is better to tok to her alone.....
yar....and if everything goes smoothly.....

suddenly feel like toking to someone.....
but.....
hmm......
i think it is better to tok to myself and be a nut case....
oh no.....i am thinking alot agn.....
y is this old prob of mine coming back agn?
me shall go to slp aft blogging.....

i dun feel like going to mawai.....
beside the whole issue abt leeches.....
i juz dun feel safe.....
and i dun like it when ppl tt i dunno also go.....
ok lah....juz say tt i am scared.....
yes i am scared.....
i have nvr ever been to a camp before.....
and i assume tt i dun like camps.....
the idea of living in a place full of bugs.....
the idea of playing games and getting urself wet and muddy.....
the idea of living in the wildness.....
with no proper facillities.....
no tv no lappy....
simply nothing.....
and i rather stay here and work and earn money.....
then to go mawai and bangkok.....
i juz dun feel secure.....
haiz....

anyway.....
a little thing to be happy abt....
yar....i am completing my lvl G eng.....

enuf for today.....
i hope tt these few days i will have the motivation to start and know how to write my report and my tutorial......
and of cos start studying for my exams......
and have to do the troublesome poster.....
for some stupid scientific meeting....
which huever tt join got in....
wat kind of scientific meeting is tt?

*listening to wo hen xiang ai ta by twins now.....
simply like the lyrics....
floating into dreamland......*

2006-07-21T02:23:00.000+08:00

[mood] :)
[listening] ni zui yong gan - twins
[doing] tutorial presentation
[thinking] something

i got so much things to do....
haiz....
sianz sia....

life as polyclinic is still equally fun....
haha....
with all my colleagues....
i simply love the life there.....

i was thinking whether to work there or not.....
be a locum.....
cos auntie sharon say she need ppl to work on sat.....
and i told her i am interested to work in polyclinic.....
she ask me to consider then tell her my decision.....
me still considering....
the onli thing i dun like is tt i muz float ard all the polyclinc.....
haiz.....

*thinking*thinking*thinking*

2006-07-16T01:05:00.000+08:00

[mood] -
[listening] jia zhuang - jolin
[doing] relaxing...later work....
[thinking] today

today is my bday....
yupps....
but it seem so silent.....
nvm....
it shall be a norm day for me....

thanks for those hu rmb my bday.....
-Vanessa
-Magdeline
-Priscillia
-all staff of bb polyclinic
-my special boy :)

My prezzies.....

A silent bday......
A silent yr ahead........

2006-07-13T21:39:00.000+08:00

[mood] *yawn*
[listening] wo men de ji nian ri - fan weiqi
[doing] trying to do something
[thinking] haiz

we did a stupid thing today.....
a fire drill......
it was really lame.....
and so funny.....
hear all the staff tok abt pts.....
when the staff say "got fire" and ask pt to get out of the building.....
the pt say "blaf me de, i want my med...."
wat if it is a real one?

me and zixiu mislabelled a tube today.....
we were like "arghhhhh".....
luckily we manage to get someone in je polyclinic to remove the tube and sent it back to us b4 it reaches AH.....
heng ar.....

today i celebrated mine and auntie sharon's bday......

* auntie sharon n me

and gladys jie jie buy de cake is so nice........
a really big chocolate cake......

thanks gladys jie jie......
and lunch we went to eat at the coffee shop nearby.....
we really have a nice chat during lunch.....
so nan de everyone eat lunch together.....
Thanks everyone for the lunch and cake......
I LOVE BB POLYCLINIC!
*wonderful memories of bb polyclinic.....

* Zixiu n me

* me, Gladys jie jie and Wai teng

* Kim, me and Ivy

tml auntie sharon will be on leave.....
and someone called "caroline" will be coming over.....
and tml me half day.....
sianz sia....
i rather stay at bb ployclinic the whole day than to go back np to attend the boring lect.....
:(

2006-07-12T23:59:00.000+08:00

[mood] like tt lor.....
[listening] zhen de - zhang shao han
[doing] wat else?! work lah.....
[thinking] hmm.....tml.....the day aft tml....2 days aft tml.....3 days aft tml......
4 days aft tml

raining this morn.....
and everyone was late.....
8 am pt come in tt time.....
onli me and gladys jie jie....
stress sia....
but luckily zixiu and auntie sharon came shortly aft tt......

guess wat?
i met my sec 1 chi teacher today.....
and i help him do ecg.....
he recognises me but couldn't rmb my name.....
but i am glad tt he still rmb me.....
really hopes tt he take good care of his health.....

started copying the SOP today.....
sianz.....
can i dun study so hard and still get good results?
can i have 10% of Ron's brain? lol......

really tired nowadays.....
and my throat a bit dry.....
feeling giddy at work today....
and my gastric prob is coming back.....
din tell any of my colleagues.....
getting sick izzit?
nah.....if i go see the doc....
she will say tt i overworked.....
waste my money.....
so wat if i overwork?
so wat if i work till i die?
die jiu die lah.....
then i dun have to worry abt my results anymore.....
and all my undone reports.....
i am getting a big headache.....

2006-07-10T23:53:00.000+08:00

[mood] bad
[listening] yi yan wan nian - SHE
[doing] h/w
[thinking] my lousy results
[quote] study = no study, so y must i study?

got back my ct paper today.....
guess wat?
i failed one module.....
yeah.....
dotx....
fail chem.....sianz.....
haem and micro also juz passed onli.....
wat to do? *shrugs*
it only proves tt i am stupid......

kanna nag by ms ong also.....
she ask me if i am working....
i said yes.....
but i din tell her i got 2 jobs......
she will sure scold one lor.....
she even suggest tt i go ask auntie sharon see if i can work at polyclinic which pays $7 per hour......
haha.....
i was thinking.....
"pls lah! hu would wanna employ me.....
yue bang yue mang onli......lol......"
and the poor Ron.....
haha.....
kanna implicated.....

anyway.....
by right i should be contented tt i passed 2 modules cos i din study......
but......
i really xin hui yi leng le......
dishearted.....

the stupid mawai thingy changed agn....
to the wk of 2nd to 6th oct.....
wasn't tt interested in tt....
with all the leeches ard....
yucks.....
but i looked forward to the bangkok trip.....
wohoo.....
finally i am going beyond malaysia.....
haha.....

tml will be back at polyclinic.....
i hope nothing goes wrong.....
yupps....

sianz ah!!!
still got so much work to do :
- polyclinic report
- fyp report
- fyp presentation
- tutorial presentation
- 8 tutorial essays
i am going crazy man......

*yawnz* tata......

2006-07-09T22:52:00.000+08:00

[mood] ???
[listening] ni zui yong gan - twins
[doing] tutorial
[thinking] someone......
[quote]-

was busy the whole day today....
wanted to go to church but i was really tired....
slept at 3 yesterday.....
so din manage to get up......

aft tt i went for my class....
then to tutor my cousin....
then went to jp to buy something for auntie sharon.....
yupps....

nxt wk i hope it would be a wonderful wk for me.....
will be celebrating auntie sharon and my bday at polyclinic.....
thanks to zixiu....haha....she is the one hu suggest and organise it......
it would be on thurs cos auntie sharon is off n i have to be at np on fri.....
and sat will be going out with my dear colleagues.....
shopping dinner and stuff......
:D

and yar,
HAPPY BDAY to my dearies:

kak Siti - end of june
Xilei - start of july
Caiqing - 4th july
Fiona - 14th july
auntie Sharon - 14th july
Yushu - 17th july
Sherlyn - 17th july
Xinni - 19th july

Best wishes and God bless......

tt's all folks!!!

hai yang de dui an
shi meng xiang de gang wan
huo shi nan mian shi bai
ou er gu dan
zong neng zui gan
ru guo shou le xiao xiao de feng han
wo de xin yi zhi wei ni qu nuan
ni zhi dao wo yong yuan bu li kai

yue guo yi pian hai
shi ni zai de gang wan
sui ran nan mian shi bai ou er gu dan
wo neng ming bai
nu li jie shou yan qian de tiao zhan
wo de xin yi zhi he ni tong zai
wo zhi dao ni yi zhi zui yong gan

2006-07-03T01:41:00.000+08:00

[mood] ?
[listening] yi ge xiang xia tian yi ge xing qiu tian - fan weiqi
[doing] reading notes
[thinking] the song "wo hai ji de" by liang jing ru
[quote] i am autumn, but hu is my summer?

have been really busy but happy.....
i really love my attachment at bb polyclinic.....
i did a lot of tests with my bld on fri.....
and it came out all norm.....
lol....it is suppose to be norm.....
haha.....
but i got a needlestick injury on the same day.....
:'(

yesterday was work......
it was huiling's last day.....
so sad....2 yrs colleagues le.....
wish her all the best....

have been thinking alot nowadays.....
i think my lao mao bing is back.....
haha....
but still ok.....
controllable.....
juz thinking of my future.....
so fan.....

tml is mon agn.....
back to lect.....so sianz.....
i hope tues come fast fast.....
so tt i can go back to polyclinic :D

Dear,
although i noe u wun look at this cos i nvr gave u my blog add.....
or mayb i nvr wanted to let u noe this......
but ya.....
take good care of urself in army,k?
or else there will be no one to
ask me "how r u?",
chat with me on wkends,
listen to my nonsense n
quarrel with me le......
no matter what,
juz be happy and healthy always.......

with lots of luv......

*A friend noes wat u want even before u say it, so hu is the one tt noe wat i want?*

To Smurffy,
it was nice chatting with u online.....
although i have nvr meet u,
but it was really nice noeing u online.....
take gd care in army.....
look forward to chatting with u agn.....

PS: the story u sent me is really nice......

2006-06-29T00:37:00.000+08:00

[mood] :)
[listening] ming tian qing tian - sun yan zi
[doing] hw
[thinking] nothing
[quote] -

long time no post le......

today is my 2nd day at bb polyclinic......
it was very fun working there.....
my mentors are all very nice ppl.....
sharon, zixiu, gladys they all......
and i did bld taking today also....
but i forget to record down on the phlembotamy list.....
haiz.....

life have been quite quiet for me nowadays.....
or izzit becoz i am not with my frenz?
lolx.....
dunno leh.....life at bb polyclinic is much more relaxing........

one more thing....
i dunno how to start with my report.....
both polyclinic and proj report.....
and proj ppt.....
haiz.....how huh?
can anyone teach me?

nxt wk need to start work lor.....
two more students starting tuition.....
good luck to me man.....

tml will be another busy day for me.....
jia you wor.....
*yawnz*

2006-06-16T00:33:00.000+08:00

[mood] bad bad n bad
[listening] ni zhi dao wo ai ni - qiu ze
[doing] work
[thinking] some stupid module....later in the post u will noe.....
[quote] Mayb God had chosen my path for me....

today i went for my cpr course....
or wat is noe as the BCLS....
and it sux terribly....
let's start fr the beginning of the day.....

LATECOMERS ARE NOT ALLOWED TO ENTER THE CLASS
this is put on our booklet by the instructor....
and guess wat....
he himself was late for 15 mins....
stupid....
i should have print this instruction big big and paste it straight on his face.....

during the pract test,
they were so slow and inefficient lor....
made us wait and wait and wait.....
feel like going in and ask them,
"CAN U BE FASTER AND DUN TAKE UR TIME?"

yar.....and i failed my theory twice.....
and the prob is.....
where the hell did i go wrong?
none of us ( the 4 second time failures) noe where we went wrong.....
basket....
have to go for retest on 28th....

then i was telling eve.....
mayb God is trying to select my path for me.....
if i fail this and could not be a part time phelmbotamist,
me will be going on to full time teaching.....
and forget abt this line.....
i noe i will be wasting my 3 yrs of studies....
but....
i juz dun wanna stay here.....
it sux.....
the environment sux.....
the stress sux.....
the people sux.....
and i am not going to uni.....
so y waste my time?
if i have no degree,i will not have much future in this line izzen it?
teaching although the pay is really uncomparable to being a med tech.....
and i mayb earning 1000+ per month? with part time at most also 1300+?
but i think i will like it more there.....
dunno y.....juz like it more then the sucky lab......

forget abt tt thing le......
i leave it to God....
he will decide wat is good for me....
and one thing,
i left my notes in the waiting rm.....
and i couldn't be bothered abt it.....
destined.....

ct is coming....
and i am not studying.....
shit....
i haven started.....
and i dunno where to start.....
and i dunno y to start, since i am leaving this line.....
nah....the fustrating thing is.....
u noe u are leaving,
and yet u still have to get the dip before u go.....
haiz....

i am really tired....
juz tired.....
in the 'giving up mode' le....
my concern now is not to get As.....
but to pass and quickly graduate.....
and therefore,
i decide to spend more time on work now.....
studywise juz make sure i dun fail......
and get my dip.....

my advice to ppl out there:
dun come into biomed if,
1) u cannot take the stress
2) u r not going to uni
3) u dun like routine work

i admit tt i have made the wrong choice.....

* i am going to break down any moment*

2006-06-10T02:06:00.000+08:00

[listening] xi wang - chen huiling
[mood] tired
[thinking] ct and tutorials lah....wat else.....
[doing] TRYING very hard to do my tutorial....
[quote] a tired man is an irritable man

ok....wat else to write.....complains......
pls bear with me for a while.....

so much tutorials to do.....
and my private students setting of worksheets.....
marking and some stupid stuff......
feel like giving up......
but i noe i cannot.....
juz dunno y......
mayb working so hard make me not so stress in my course.....
or mayb i am escaping fr something.....
i dunno.....

kk.....enuf.....i also buay tahan.....so much complains......

now something happy.....
i have got job offer le.....
being a full time assistant at XXX learning centre.....
wohoo.....
thanx ms gan......
but another prob......
the centre is onli open fr sat to tues....
tt means other days i need another part time......
omg.....where am i going to find a part time.....
related to my course and at the same time onli work on wed thurs and fri?
*shrugs*
okok.....i shall juz leave it until the day i graduate......
then think abt it.....

feel like my energy is all drained......
tired.....

Being a part in ur journey of life is my happiness
For i will be ur companion if u r lonely
Being a listener to ur stories is my pleasure
For i will be the comforter if u cry
Being a person hu always walk behind u is my insist
For i will be support if u fall
Being a friend to u is my blessing
For i will be forever by ur side
Forever ur companion, ur comforter and ur support
Ur friend

ok.....tt is my crappy eng.....
*not suitable for eng pros*

*yawnz*

2006-05-15T23:14:00.000+08:00

[listening] ai shi ni yen li de yi shou qing ge - guo mei mei
[mood] sianz
[thinking] work homework....smurfy?lol.....
[doing] going to do my hw
[quote] be yourself man!

long time no blog le.....

so nowadays me is busy with proj tutorial essays reports work studies and all the shit......
haiz.....
blah....i am not going to tok abt all tt......
or mayb juz a short one.....

tt proj is bored bored and very bored......
especially this 2 wks....
keep failing....
gel pcr gel pcr gel pcr.....
tt is wat i rmb abt proj.....
and the stupid report is like.....haiz.....

work is ok.....still have a lot of fun with the kids.....
and of cos my dear shannon, jerry, kiarra.....
and lots lots of them.....
hu brought happiness into my life....
with their innocent smiles.....
my little angelz :)

and i recently juz got a tuition job.....
to teach my cousin maths.....
starting nxt wk.....
still haven decide wat to put in her ws....
still sourcing for qns......
headache.....

today had our tutorial meeting.....
and it sux....
cos it reminded me tt i have a lot of work undone.....

and today.....
ms ong juz told us tt we r going to have oral exam....
they really think tt we had all the time in the world to do all these stupid things.....
of no good....

okok.....enuf of complains.....

recently playing pangya online.....
chao shuang lor.....
now i beginner E le.....
wohoo.....
and fr this game, i get to noe a lot of 'frenz'....
one of which is smurfy......lol.....
yar....he is really a friendly guy.....
not too ugly also....opps.... :P
haha....yar.....
at least got ppl wanna play game with such a com idiot like me......lol....
he is 20, waiting to go to army......
so got tons of time to play.....
not like me lor.....so packed.....

haiz....tiredz.....betta go do my work now......

2006-04-26T18:34:00.000+08:00

[mood] exceptionally gd
[listening] -
[doing] play pangya
[thinking] proj
[quote] nvr fear!!!

i did smthg big today....
haha....
i went to donate bld...
woohoo....
so happy.....

2006-04-19T14:47:00.000+08:00

[mood] ok
[listening] si lu - liang jing ru
[doing] playing online game
[thinking] test tml
[quote] -

phlembotamy will end tml with the test.....
:(
thanx to my teachers.....
iris and mdm tang.....
thanx so much for having so much patience for a student like me......
thanks.....

hol is ending this wk....
my yr 3 life is really starting le.....
will be so damn busy.....
with my project and attachment.....
i hope nothing goes wrong....
:)

2006-03-29T17:34:00.000+08:00

[mood] ok
[listening] feng - Jay chou
[thinking] nothing
[doing] emailing ppl
[quote] -

my results are out:
haem - C+
micro - B
LTI2 - C+
bad right?but i am thankful that i passed it.....

yesterday and the day b4 i had my phlebotamy class.....
it was horror....
and with the mistakes we make.....
i cannot imagine if tt is the pt's hand.....

2006-03-23T18:25:00.000+08:00

P.S thanks to those hu read my blog and tag me.....thanks for ur encouragements.....it makes me feel tt at least someone in this world cares....May God Bless U......

2006-03-23T17:53:00.000+08:00

[listening] yin xing de chi pang - zhang shao han
[mood] bored
[thinking] results?
[doing] at my aunt house playing with my cousins
[quote] mei yi ci dou zai gu dan pai huai zhong jian qiang, mei yi ci jiu suan hen shou shang dan ye bu shan lei guang......

time flies....
tml results would be out....
and on the 28th i will be back in school....
chionging very hard for my final yr......
sigh....

some updates....

i did well for my common test!!!
18 for LTI 1 , 23 for micro (miracle) and 21 for heam....
woohoo....this is consider good compare to the number of failures in my class.....

went ecp with nora on 14th march......
it was suppose to be a gathering with the excolleagues but.....
no one turn up.....
in the end me and her went to ecp ourself...
but we also had a lot of fun cycling......
aft tt met shimin for lunch and shopping at bugis.....
when i reach home i was so damn tired.....
but it was fun.....

18 march i went to yushu wedding at huai en tang.....
finally she is getting married.....
she look so pretty tt day.....
and the couple is so loving....
see already me also wanna fast fast get married le.....lol.....juz kidding.....
it was such a happy occasion....
juz some not so happy things,
1. kanna forced to sing with the choirs
2. my leg hurts after walking so long with the new heels on
so she is married,
dunno whether to feel sad or happy......
nobody to nag me go church le.....
or rather, nobody cares if i got go church or not.....
haiz....
aft the wedding went bugis to shop agn before going home.....

i passed my kumon lvl J maths AT!!!
hehe.....in onli 2wks plus i cleared my lvl J.....
now doing lvl K,but it dun seemed easy.....
dun think can clear tt fast le.....
but should be able to catch up with the lvl L guy quite soon.....
and my eng lvl FII is also finishing.....
will be doing my test on this coming tues.....
good luck to me!!!!

oh ya....
bryan wong wins the star idol....
and cui fang wins the super host!!!

okok.....me couldn't think of anymore updates le....
hmm....it looks like i am not tt pessi....
haha, couldn't rmb any sad things tt happen these few wks....

signing off.....
will be back to update aft release of results.....
good luck and God bless to me!!!

2006-03-18T20:01:00.000+08:00

so sianz.....
hp down also ....
wah biang...
i think i am damn suay lor.....
everything also go agnst me.....

I WANT A NEW PHONE!!!

2006-03-10T21:41:00.000+08:00

my lappy is down.....grrr....
so sianz....

2006-02-15T00:19:00.000+08:00

[mood] bad
[listening] ying xing de chi pang - zhang shao han
[doing] TRYING to study
[thinking] studies
[quote] ------

another lonely valentine.....
an angry one somemore.....

my sis juz got her new phone yesterday.....
idoit.....
i wanted to change my phone also.....
so unfair.....
she kept changing her phone.....
use my mum's plan somemore.....
i can onli use my plan....
which means i can onli change my phone once every 21 mths......

see....
like i say....
my parents are pian xin.....
i am juz a nobody in their eyes.....

feeling so bad mood today.....
mayb becos of yesterday's incident and today.....
valentines' day and i am at home mugging like siao.....
have no wish to think abt anithing.....

*i juz wander if anyone would read this blog*
sometimes i wish someone would....
but at the same time.....
i wish nobody was reading it.....
so mao dun.....
tt is woman.....

oh ya.....
rmb so many bad things.....
i alsmost forgot a good one.....
i did my achievement test for lvl I today.....
and i got full marks!!!
thank God....
*pat myself on my back*
how i wish my exam will be tt easy.....
*pray*
i noe it is impossible....
but anyway.....
i am going to slp early today and mug tml....
cos i have no idea wat i am studying now.....
seriously.....
damn restless nowadays.....

2006-02-01T00:15:00.000+08:00

[mood] soso
[listening] some lame cny songs on 933
[doing] trying to study and not to slp at the same time
[thinking] tml still got lect, sianz.....
[quote] before u learn how to fly, learn how to touch down first.....

cny would be over soon.....
everything would be back to norm.....
sch, work and classes.....

a few days before.....
i asked my mum....
if i could take up chinese in kumon as well.....
she asked me in returned....
"y do u wanna push urself so much?"

yar....y did i wanna push myself so much?
i dun noe......
but i kinda like my life now....
when i get really really really tired.....
and i dun have the energy to think tt much.....
i dun have to entertain ppl.....
i dun have to waste my time idling.....
i dun have to think of wat to do everyday.....
the routine juz goes on and on.....
but i learnt something.....
how to rest when i was given the time to.......
i did not cry tt much anymore.....
not becos i am not stressed......
but becos i am so stressed everyday....
so used to it le.....
there are no encouragements, care and concern in my life....
i can onli use some stupid method like keeping my time real packed to keep my life going on......
time passes day aft day.....
onli now i feel tt my time actually passes....

2006-01-26T00:18:00.000+08:00

[mood] :D
[listening] shan hu hai - jay chou and lara
[doing] studying later
[thinking] a lot
[quote] mayb God wants me to learn not to be pessimistic.....

i got back my results for ct today.....
out of 30 marks each......
i got 18 for chem,
20 for haem,
and 23 for micro......
woohooo!!!!
first time i scored so well for micro.....
haha.....

ok.....enuf of happiness.....
muz work hard for exams.....
i noe it is impossible.....
but i really hope to see an 'A' in my results......
at least once in my life at nuh.....

kk.....back to work le.....
jia you to me wor!!!!
:)

2006-01-24T01:16:00.000+08:00

[mood] tireds
[listening] wo hai ji de - liang jing ru
[doing] blogging la....uppa then?
[thinking] life
[quote] nobody ever accompany u for life....not even ppl closest to u......

very long nvr blog here le.....
very stressed up cos exam is in less then a month time.....
and ct results would be known in 2 days time......
tired due the the packed schedule i have....

haiz.....
ttsh attachment is going to end soon.....
i will miss the staff there.....
especially cp and chem.....
siti, denise, farah, lishan, sidah, soo, wendy, kelly, melody, sanjay and lots lots more......
going to miss them a lot.....
i dun think i will be going to ttsh to work aft i graduate.....
so really going to miss them....
and a real big THANKS to them for making my attachment there so fun......
and they really taught me alot.....
no amount of words can be used to express my appreciation.....
i juz wish them all the best in the future.....

juz as i was bidding gd bye to them,
at the same time,
i also need to welcome mr exams.....
*headache*

and my long hol is gone.....
and the horror is.....
i am going to learn phlebotamy......
*ahhhhh.........*
:'( helpz!!!!!

life is going to me tough to me in the next sem.....
i hope i survive......

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dear,
do u noe y i love the song "wo hai ji de" by liang jing ru?
cos in the song there is this part of the lyrics.....

hao xiang hui dao na nian xia tian
jiao shi men qian ni xiao rong man mian
pai pai wo de tou shuo : ' ni bie ku.
kao huai yi ci bu shi mo ri,
wei lai hai you hen chang de lu,
wo men yao yi qi qu kan shi jie......

it reminds me tt time....
during the release of o lvl chi results.....
i cried becos i din do well.....
u r the first one to console me.....
it is you hu told me not to give up hope.....
mayb becos of ur words....
i survived until now......
and mayb becos of u.....
i dun wish to allow others into my life.....

i noe it is impossible between us.....
i jus hope u r well.....
love u always.....

2006-01-01T02:52:00.000+08:00

[mood] -
[listening] bu xiang zhang da - SHE
[doing] hw
[thinking] about 2005
[quote] time flies....

happy new yr to me.....
now is already 2006....
i hope it will be a great year ahead.....

wishes....
1) nice friends....
2) boyfriend...opps....haha....juz kidding.....
3) nice family.....
4) good results.....of cos.....
5) world peace....
6) no stress....a bit the difficult hor.....

2005 is a stressful and not very happy yr for me.....
i juz hope everything will be gone.....
juz like 2005.....

cheers....

2005-12-30T01:10:00.000+08:00

[mood] stressed
[listening] ai I-N-G - mayday
[doing] revision
[thinking] someone.....
[quote] time passes, but love remains.....

tml is my ct paper le....
very scared i will fail it....
really....
there is so much things to study.....
and i scare due to the 2 wks breaks tt we gotten aft much arguement with ms ong.....
the paper will be much more difficult....
haiz.....how huh?
*prayz*

it was so long ever since i chat with him.....
i am so glad to chat with him once agn....
juz excited and.....
i dunno how to describe.....

nvr manage to got together during sec sch....
and one good news.....
he is still not attached......
dunno is a good news or not but.....
aiya i also dunno lah....
dunno whether still got chance or not.....
2 yrs le.....
it had been 2 yrs since i graduated.....
and 2 yrs of being single.....
any chance?
i will leave it to fate ba.....

he is waiting for his a lvls result.....
all the best to him....
i really hope he do well....
he had nvr been disappointing.....
anyway, he WILL do well.....
cos he is fr rj.....

nitez to him....
missing him :)

2005-12-25T01:39:00.000+08:00

[mood] :(
[listening] tian hui - SHE
[doing] trying hard to study.....but my mood is affecting me....
[thinking] haiz
[quote] wat a christmas.....haiz....

a lonely christmas.....
a sad christmas.....

wo de tian kong jin tian you dian hui
wo de xin shi ge luo ye de ji jie
wo bu zhi dao ru he du guo jin ye
suo you de ding zao yi quan dou xi mie

2005-12-24T00:53:00.000+08:00

[mood] sad
[listening] tian hui - SHE
[doing] thinking
[thinking] my frenz
[quote] good things dun last.....

i cried on the cab juz now.....
could not control my tears.....

today's concert was a success.....
but i am not feeling happy.....
cos my frenz are leaving me.....
those who bother to care abt me are all leaving.....

yushu is getting married nxt yr and will be going to her husband's church......

sis leona will be flying here and there nxt yr and will not be leading the choir for next yr jan to jun.....july onwards dunno if she wants to come back to lead the choir once more......i really hope she would be back soon.....

pastor is retiring nxt yr.....and dunno if they will continue to stay in this church......although shimu can be naggy at times.....but at least she truely cares abt me.....

sis jia jing may also be leaving nxt yr.....although i noe her onli for a short period of time......but she really treats me well....

i cannot imagine wat the church will be like nxt yr......
i am really scared tt i may not enjoy going to church anymore......
ppl tt cares abt me left.....
tears fell again....

i am also disappointed tt my mum and sis din go for the concert today......

a few months later.....
i will be leaving ttsh too.....
the ppl there are really nice.....
i so she bu de.....

y izzit tt ppl ard me are all leaving me?
is it destined tt i will be alone in this world?
with nobody to care abt me?

:'(

regardless of wat.....
i wish them all the best in watever they do.....
God bless.....

:'(

2005-12-22T00:26:00.000+08:00

[mood] stressed juz now, but now ok le.....
[listening] xing xing zhi huo - SHE
[doing] studying....wat else....
[thinking] staph aureus....argh....
[quote] studying makes ppl tired and easily angered.....

a million thanx to denise.....
hu chatted with me juz minutes ago.....
u really cheers me up after stressing for hours.....
thanxie.....

have been studying for 6 hrs non stop......
except for dinner time....
my stress lvl is now 300%.....
my brain is filled with microorganisms.....
feel like crying.....
haiz.....

juz scared i fail my ct agn.....
if fail agn, ms ong sure scold de.....
then my exam sure wan dan.....
how ar?
my brain seems to be malfunctioning.....
and my memory is failing as time passes.....

can anyone save me?

2005-12-21T01:30:00.000+08:00

[mood] stress tiredz
[listening] lu cheng - fan wei qi
[doing] revision
[thinking] haiz
[quote] i am a small part of the world....so small until no ones even bothers.....

study study and study....
fun huh?
cannot rmb things...
my mind is going to explode soon......

i kept my schedule as full as possible.....
juz to keep me away fr thinking.....
and yet....
now i am so stress up.....
until i could not breathe.....

all these are to numb myself,izzen it?
then y am i feeling so tired?
falling sick soon i think.....
but hu ever cares?

parents onli noe how to scold....
sis onli bothers abt her own things....
friends? i dun think i have any tt i can confide to......
or mayb, nobody ever bothers.....

how i wish i dun exist.....
i am here onli to waste food and resources.....
like my parents says....
i am here to collect debts.....
so y did u even bother to bring me to this world?
as if i want to be here.....

nobody understands..... :'(
y i have to cry to slp night aft night......

2005-12-20T22:33:00.000+08:00

[mood] sad angry
[listening] tian hui - SHE
[doing] studying
[thinking] haiz
[quote] mummy is not a mummy when she dun cares.....

i juz wonder.....
if one day i dies.....
anyone would rmb me?
i think only my Heavenly Father would.....

tt is life....
sis leona told me to look at the brighter side of life....
wat is the brighter side?
to lie to urself tt everything is well?

i see my shadows in her.....
in front of ppl.....
i always seem so cheerful....
but....
hu really noes how i was feeling?

sometimes being cheerful is such a chore....
i seem to be decieving others.....
decieving myself at the same time....

Father,

Bless all the ppl ard me.....
those hu appear in and disappear fr my life.....
those hu helped or hurt me before....
those hu cares abt me sincerely....
even if they dunno u or they are unwilling to accept....
pls bless them....

Forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. ~Matthew 6:12~

Amen

2005-12-19T23:25:00.000+08:00

[mood] tired sianz and watever u can think of
[listening] heng xin de heng xin - mayday
[doing] eng hw
[thinking] ct and wat else?
[quote] life sux....

went shopping today....
and spent near to 100 bucks on clothes....
aft tt went kbox....
yupps....
tt is all the happy things i had today....

ct on 30th dec.....
9 to 11 at dental audi.....
how ar?
i study liao....
but now it seems like....
argh....
it always happen.....
whenever i get stress up and panic.....
watever i studied is gone....
i dun wanna fail agn....
i dun want.....
so many ppl are expecting gd results fr me....
me myself also expecting gd results.....
but i nvr get it....
no matter how hard i try....
can anyone help me?
i dun wanna cry myself to slp everyday before the exam....

*sobx*

2005-12-17T01:20:00.000+08:00

[mood] :(
[listening] chun ni - harlem yu
[doing] trying to slp
[thinking] cp staff
[quote] tian xia mei you bu san de yan xi

today is my last day at cp.....
so sad.....
wun be seeing them for a month plus cos of the 2 wks break and micro attachment.....
:(
they are such a nice bunch of ppl.....
so she bu de.....
i will miss them de.....
and today's is terrance's last day.....
kelly is going to bts.....
so sad tt so many is leaving....
:(

went shopping with wendy aft sch....
bought christmas present for vanessa, reina, jessie and sis leona......
yupps.....
i am so broke now.....
still muz buy dress for peformance.....
still got cny clothes haven buy yet.....
and still own my auntie 150 bucks.....
and short of 50 bucks to pay for kumon fees.....
argh!!!!!
ultimate broke now.....
haiz......

2005-12-15T01:12:00.000+08:00

[mood] tired
[listening] bu xiang zhang da - SHE
[doing] hw
[thinking] too tired to think
[quote] zhi zu chang le

went dinner with sis leona aft choir pract....
and i am so proud of myself,
i actually finished a cup of apple-carrot juice....
haha
wat an achievement!!!

we tok alot....
then she said my good and bad pts....

good
-committed in everything i do
-hardworking

bad
-no disipline in daily lifestyle
-pessimistic
-not adaptable

saded....
now i realise my bad pts are more than my good pts.....
haiz....

2005-12-07T22:30:00.000+08:00

[mood] angry
[listening] wan jun biao mei - zhang feng qi
[doing] my hw later
[thinking] i dunno
[quote] i have a mum = no mum

i noe u love mei more than me....
everything also she gets....
i onli gets the scoldings....
fine....
i dun need u to survive....
u juz make me digusted of this so called 'home'.....
since u like working so much...
y dun u juz go and work and dun come back?
u can stay there for all u want.....
since ur frenz are more impt than ur family.....
go ahead....
nobody is stopping u....

and dun u ever ask me to help u with anything.....
since u love ur younger daughter more....
than ask her to do....
i am not ur daughter anyway....

2005-12-06T00:47:00.000+08:00

[mood] happy
[listening] da feng chui - xu hui xin
[doing] nothing
[thinking] of u!!!
[quote] the ablility of being happy is precious....

sch was fun today....
haha....
had a great time learning malay....
and making fun of myself...
lol.....

went to fish and co with mary aft sch.....
yum yum....
aft tt we went shopping.....
and chatting as we shop.....
:) tt was so fun.....

i very long nvr enjoy myself le.....

*but there is still some things i am unhappy abt....
nvm....
since she dun see me as a fren le....
no pt i think too much right....
my circle of frenz is shifting....
anyway....
i juz be hu i am....
and i dun care hu or wat....
those hu wanna leave go ahead....
i juz take it as nothing happens....
if u choose to leave....
like i say,
i nvr believe there is a real long frenship.....
no one ever proves to me.....
there is no such things as frenz.....*

i really enjoy myself today.....
thanx to the cp staff and mary.....
*muacks*
luv ya.......

2005-11-29T23:35:00.000+08:00

[mood] tired
[listening] kuai di ai qing - stella huang
[doing] waiting for death
[thinking] ...
[quote] wat is family?

mum is sitting in front of me.....
had long for her company ever since she start working....
but now.....
both of us are so quiet.....
we dunno wat to say to each other.....
things have changed so much.....
haiz....

2005-11-29T23:23:00.000+08:00

[mood] bad
[listening] hao xiang ni - energy
[doing] toking to mum (rare chance)
[thinking] something
[quote] i dunno hu is actually my fren now.....

i dunno wat is wrong with me today.....
juz feel tired....
sianz....
a very bad mood....

sch was alright....
juz for a little thingy.....
getting very irritated by some ppl....
i dunno.....
juz a feeling.....
feel so out of the grp.....
onli they 3 are enjoying life.....
they are happily in their own world.....
and my best fren is one of them.....
i dunno wat to say.....
and something is wrong with her.....
or mayb something is wrong abt both of us today.....
anyway.....
today is a damn bad day.....

so far in cp,
click best with denise.....
compared to other stuff.....
yesterday chat with her online.....
she say tt even if we left ttsh.....
still can keep in contact....
millions of ppl tell me tt.....
and more then 90% din do it.....
even now i left nuh.....
wanna ask poh yoke and mary out also so difficult.....
this scenary will occur nxt time i left ttsh....
keep in contact with the staff?
haiz

frenz dun always stays......
i sometimes juz wish i dun have any of them.....

2005-11-29T00:09:00.000+08:00

[mood] ?
[listening] wo de ai - sun yanzi
[doing] kumon maths F101
[thinking] family and frenz
[quote] "sometimes i feel as if no one ever loves me......"

today i had a great day at cp.....
joking and chatting with the staffs.....
and kajiaoing them....
they are such a nice bunch of ppl.....

27 nov sun
went to church....
as usual....
now i noe,
ms hong coming back on the 6th of dec.....
hmm.....
see how la....

*some tots*
nice frenz are hard to find....
even if u find one,
the frenz may not stay....
haiz....
this world is like tt.....
when a person steps into ur life.....
another person will leave without u noticing.....
when u began to realise tt,
it is hard to contact the fren agn.....

sis leona ask me not to be pessimistic....
i can onli say....
nobody understands me.....
i also dun understand myself.....
being pessimistic is already part of me....
part of my life....
and there is nothing for me to be optimistic abt.....

haiz

2005-11-26T01:01:00.000+08:00

[mood] fine
[listening] tong lei - sun yanzi
[doing] practise xmas songs
[thinking] of someone.....
[quote] " everyday is the same......"

went to cp today.....
it was fun.....
for the time being....
haha....
but we made a few errors here and there.....
anyway.....
they say we did a great job!!!
:D

and today....
i ran the most in my yr 2 life.....
6 times to and fro between cp and quest....
tiring but funny....
haha.....

i feel like a counter girl at mac.....
except tt wat i give is 24hr urine bottles, blood samples etc.....
not burgers, and food stuff....
haha

*yawnz*
have to work tml.....
so sianz....

2005-11-25T01:21:00.000+08:00

[mood] :)
[listening] xmas songs for concert
[doing] practicing with the cd
[thinking] the words sis leona said yesterday
[quote] " where u r feeling low, think of the brighter side. this need to be trained as u are growing up. " by sis leona

it have been such a long time tt i last blogged here....
everything is still the same....

tml will be going to cp le.....
will be swatting flies...
haha.....

today aft work on the way home....
was toking to bel and izyan....
toking abt relationship.....
now i noe y i am unattached.....
becoz ppl kept thinking tt i am attached!!!!
i told them i am single....
they dun believe.....
do i really have the " i am attached " look?
haiz

yesterday aft choir pract.....
went home with sis leona.....
we chit chat a lot in the car....
she was telling me not to be so pessimistic....
and telling me tt i muz train myself to be optimistic.....
haiz....
hu dun want to feel happy lor?
i also want to be happy....
but....
i dunno....
the life i am leading now,
is packed and yet lonely....
and nobody ever understands me....
or even try to understand me.....
i am juz a child....
i need showers of love and concern....
i juz want more attention on me.....
is tt really so difficult?
she will not understand wat i am feeling now.....
my home izzen my home.....
my family izzen my family....
my friend izzen my friend....
i juz want everything to be alright.....
but i dunno how to solve this....
nobody listens to me.....
see....
how to be optimistic?

i was thinking....
if i were to suddenly disappear one day.....
nobody will ever notice tt i am gone....
or mayb,
even my heavenly Father,
will not even notice tt....

Father,
i noe tt i am not an obedient child....
but i have onli have a simple wish....
can u be my side always and nvr leaves me?
pls dun forsake me....
amen

:'(

2005-11-16T00:18:00.000+08:00

[mood] soso
[listening] na xie hua er - fan wei qi
[doing] kumon maths hw
[thinking] tml if going sch or not
[quote] " the best place to keep ur memories is in ur heart "

feeling a bit betta.....
but still not very ok leh.....
:(

went for my kumon class juz now.....
cleared my lvl D maths......
yeah.....

tml dunno whether going sch or not.....
still not feeling ok leh.....
haiz

2005-11-14T21:11:00.000+08:00

[mood] bad
[listening] yi ran shi peng you - yu heng
[doing] feeling awful
[thinking] nothing
[quote] "dun anyhow eat when u noe tt u are not well "

juz came back from the doc juz now.....
gastric flu.....
grrr....
feeling so awful now.....
how am i goin to slp tonight?
have been feeling like tt since 6+pm....
:(

as usual.....
at ttsh.....
today help lishan clear the 24-hr urine.....
and all the blah blah blah stuff.....
everyday is the same.....

aft tt went back to nuh for maskfitting.....
it was....weird.....
and the mask is suffocating.....

sometimes i wonder if she is my friend....
juz feel so distant....
haiz....

oh ya....one gd new.....
i got a mc for tml.....
tt means i can choose to go or not to go ttsh tml.....
will see how tml.....

2005-11-13T22:59:00.000+08:00

[mood] :)
[listening] rang wo cha diao ni de lei - cai chun jia
[doing] thinking.....
[thinking] abt hmm.......?
[quote] " i wish tt someone would love me like my heavenly father "

12 nov sat
went to the doc with my dad......
at bb polyclinic.....
he was sick since thurs.....
i saw his fbc......
shld be bacterial infection ba.....
*shrugs*

13nov sun
went to church today due to duties.....
as usual, nagging from shi mu cos nvr go choir for sometime le.....
and bad news!!!!
ms hong coming back soon.....
another round of nagging agn.....
haiz.....
went to J8 to eat aft tt with shujun....
on the bus, met tz (a guy fr my church).....
he is a quiet guy.....to me.....
cos we nvr tok to each other before.....
juz see each other at service and at most smile at each other.....
rmb last wk, me and shujun saw him at pastamania....
he is eating alone.....
i wanted to ask him to join us but i dun dare.....
cos i noe if i suggest tt, shujun will have lots of things to say and u noe.....
the aftereffect....
today, me and shujun walked into J8.....
i have this feeling tt he is behind us......
i wanted to turn back and look....
but nvr, aft shujun said:
" he macham behind us leh....but i better dun turn back and see, cos later he think i wat...."
so i din turn back also......
none of us turned ard.....
and bothers abt him.....
aft eating at yoshi....
when walking past pastamania.....
me looked into the restaurant.....
but din see him.....
oh wells.....*shrugs*

was thinking abt it.....
hmmm.....
betta dun think too much......
everything is predestined......
but he is a really nice guy.....i think :)
actually there is quite a handful of nice guys ard me.....
juz tt i let the feelings past.....
and dun bothers....
i am the type tt i let the guys make the first move.....
if not, every guy to me is a friend.....
wat am i toking sia?
shld focus on my studies instead of this kind of things.....
i am so busy with work, studies and extra classes.....
(i noe i am juz giving myself excuses)
yah....i am tt busy.....
shall not think of it anymore.....

aft tt i went for my kumon class.....
it seems like the clock there is faster than my house sia.....
miracle tt i finish my work in 28 mins.....
the last time i do the same wksht is like 30+ mins.....
so much different sia.....
haha....but anyway.....
i am abt to clear lvl D maths.....
still left with D131......
and for eng.....
i have to repeat FI 31.....
sad case....
it seems like my sis is doing betta than me sia......
at least she like din repeat much.....
and she doing like EI81 le.....
while i still repeating the first few.... :(
nvm....i will catch up with her in a matter of time.....
i dun believe i am tt bad ;)
haha.....

2005-11-09T22:07:00.000+08:00

[mood] ok
[listening] wei zhi de yi hou - cai chun jia
[doing] listening to songs
[thinking] hae lecture today
[qoute] " the easy things may seemed easy on the surface, u will not noe its difficulty until the end"

today is lect day at nuh....
janet's lect was ok.....
all abt stuff i noe.....
edwin lect was on spectrometry.....
damn sianz......
all the physics stuff on light.....
i ji tao slp thru the whole lect.....
susan's lect was damn chimalogy.....
on the 16 cells panel.....
ji tao blur thruout the lect....
haha....
rmb most of us said we wanna work at blood bank.....
cos it was easy.....
i guess all of us changes our mind now.....
allan's lect is ok.....
mostly we already noe during nuh attachment at micro lab.....

went to west mall juz now.....
to shop.....
but it seems tt there is not much to shop there....

*yawnz*

2005-11-09T00:00:00.000+08:00

[mood] tiredz
[listening] 101 ge da an - jiang mei qi
[doing] resting
[thinking] tml's lect
[quote] "If u wanna do more work, make sure u dun complain abt the after effect "

went to nuh for seniors' fyp presentation.....
i muz admit tt they speak damn well lor.....
haha....
most of them were very interesting....
oh wells, there is always exceptions.....
:) anyway, well done seniors!!!
next yr would be us liao.....

muz get started for the stupid tutorial.....
haiz.....
always got this kind of kang tao one....

went for kumon class today.....
wah lao eh....
the corrections i had ar......
can u imagine, i sit there for 2.5hrs and i still cannot clear my corrections?
and i have to repeat like half of my lvl E ws......
damn sianz diao lor.....
tot i could clear F by tues.....
but now it seems impossible....
so disheartening.....
but nvm, i shall fast fast finish lvl E and move on......
and try to complete the whole maths course in 1.5 yrs.....
jia you wor!!!

2005-11-08T00:29:00.000+08:00

[mood] slpy
[listening] di yi ci - guang liang
[doing] reading
[thinking] nothing
[quote] "silence is golden"

today was jonnie and lishan at misc bench.....
yoohooo.....
today was the best attachment day ever at ttsh.....
they teach me so much....
and i did so much stuff.....
although it was tiring.....
but at least i feel tt i am learning smthg.....
thanx jonnie and lishan.....

went centrept pizza hut with vanessa today.....
eat lots of nicey stuff....
haha....
but hor, some ppl had to spoil this peaceful dinner of ours.......
they were so noisy lor.....
they think they r the onli ones in the restaurant.....
nvm, i nvr like any ppl fr tt sch.....
hmph....

6th oct sun
din went to church......
cos me too tired to get up so early in the morning.....
dun feel so attached to church nowadays.....
had to wake up so early on my sundays.....
haiz.....
but nxt wk muz go.....
no choice.....got duties on hand.....
sometimes i was thinking.....
mayb me and shujun sign up for the duties juz to keep ourself attached to the church ba......
so tt we have no choice but to go.....
haiz.....

went to my kumon lesson....
did my AT for lvl B, C and D.....
all close to full marks.....
lost a few marks due to some silly mistakes....
haha....but nvm....
ms gan say i got potential to finish maths in the shortest period of time.....
hehe....i also hope so.....
my reading also done well..... :)
proceeding to lvl F maths loh.....
jia you!!!

aft tt went granny house.....
the soup so damn shi shui zhun lor....
not nice at all....
there also so boring....
nothing to do.....
then it is so far away somemore....
sianz ar.....

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

tt's all folks!!!

2005-11-06T01:07:00.000+08:00

[mood] sianzation
[listening] wo shi xin fu de - liang jing ru
[doing] preparing to slp aft this
[thinking] tml whether going church or not
[quote] "nobody cares....."

went to work as usual.....
aft tt,went for health screening.....
everything is normal except for my body fat percentage....
which was higher by 0.8......
oh wells......
wun be dying so soon......
since i am tt healthy.....
*shrugs*

went for choir practice.....
it was so damning sianz.....
or rather....
i am too tired to enjoy the singing....
ji tao want to slp.....
and have to bear with the hunger (cos i din eat due to the health screening)......
haiz.....

went to pastamania to eat aft tt with shujun......
it was nice eating with her.....
and chatting also....

shall i go church tml?
or should i not?
so sianz, so tired......
aft the torture at ttsh....
aiya, hu cares.....
tml then see how.....
feel like going then go lor......

sometimes i juz wander if anybody cares.....
not feeling moody, juz thinking.....
cos it is like.....
the ppl ard me....
macham all in their own world....
or rather....
i am living in my own world.....
and nobody bothers to care......
haiz.....

2005-11-04T01:09:00.000+08:00

[mood] ok
[listening] wu tiao jian wei ni - Liang Jingru
[doing] msning with poh yoke
[thinking] tml muz go ttsh....sianz ar.....
[quote] "life sux...."

31 oct mon
first day of sch at ttsh.....
the lab was damn big lor....
and so high tech....
we go there like "wahhh".....
like some sua koo fr kampong....
haha....
then got lost in there some more......
so funny.....

but attachment was boring......
we macham some idiots fr nuh....
muz teach fr scratch.....
how to allocate the urine in tubes also muz teach.....
haiz.....

i hope tt fri wun be tt bad.....

1 nov tues
rot and rot and rot.....
gd day for resting....

2 nov wed
lect at nuh....
miss nuh sooooo muchy....
haha....
but nvr see py and mary :(
but had a nice day!!!
being in an environment so familiar with.....
:)

but muz do project....
grrrr......
dunno which idoit told np tt we r not given enuf chance to speak in public.....
and we kanna all the shit.....
so angry.....
nobody actually cares abt us......
being so busy with our studies le.....
stilll muz do the so called projects.....
i am still a student u noe!!!
and i have all my wkdays morning attachment fr 9 to 5......
some days night and wkends working part time and tuitions......
now still got project.....
mayb i will die soon fr working too hard......
haiz.....

went to the teresa tang concert.....
it was so well done!!!
the songs were so nice and the singer really looked like her.....
amazing.....
really missed her songs and her....
so ke xi tt she died so early.....
so gan ren the concert.....

3 nov thurs
rested at home today again.....
did my kumon hw.....
it was getting difficult man.....

*prays* tml's class will be betta.....

2005-10-27T01:41:00.000+08:00

[mood] tired
[listening] gai shi ni de - ou de yang
[doing] juz finished my hw for kumon
[thinking] a lot....
[quote] "nvr ever trust anyone, or u will be the one being hurt the most in the end"

very long nvr blog here le....
here are some events ever since the last blog....

16th Oct sun
din went to church today....
due to some unhappy things i encounter.....
i nvr expect someone like her to lie to me.....
if i had made tt decision,
i will nvr believe tt she will lie to me.....
haiz...now i noe,
nvr trust anyone....
even the closest ppl will lie to u.....
y izzit tt ppl muz lie to me?
looks like i cannot trust her anymore....
muz decide wat to do this sunday....
to avoid her....
or rather, i may not want to be close to her....
nvm abt tt le.....i dun wanna think so much....

me finally persuaded my sis to go tuition together!!!
haha.....
will be going to kumon st 31......
yeah....
at least i have something besides my course to learn abt....
will be taking maths and eng.....
eng is because my eng is lousy.....
maths because i would like to continue learning maths.....
and my aunt help me to call the centre to make appt for diagnostic test....
it will be on the 23th oct.....

20th oct thurs
as usual....
work and more work....
nothing much....
but quite excited tt i will be in kumon studying too.....
looking at my students.....
haha.....
i think i mayb starting lvl DI for eng and lvl G or H for maths......

21st oct fri
today i went to caiqing's house to do medicure....
she damn pro sia.....
but she keep saying she do until not nice....
where got lor?
she is much more betta then me lor.....
i dun even noe how to put the nail polish....
haha.....
and yenshi and me keep suaning her.....
haha....
yenshi keep saying tt some guy like her....
and caiqing keep saying tt tt guy like yenshi not her....
but in the end, i still dunno which guy they toking abt....
nvm....

aft tt i went to bugis with thanda and sherlyn.....
went to a thai restaurant to eat.....
the tomyum soup is very nice lor....
hot and sour enuf....
but the portion is like damn small lor....
but nvm....
aft tt we went sim lim sq.....
thanda bought a mp3 player.....
then we went back to bugis centre to eat ice cream.....
the ice cream is soooooo nicey!!!
and we keep asking thanda when she getting married.....
haha....and she say mayb in 1 to 2 yrs time.....
wah.....got xi jiu he le wor......
hehe.....

22nd oct sat
today no work....
woohoo!!!
wanna go ah ma's house but aunt say she got ot....
haiz....

but nvm....
me and my sis went to bugis.....
at 7pm ++....
haha,we really shen jing bing.....
go there so late....
me bought a handbag tt i always wanted......
i saw it yesterday when shopping with thanda and sherlyn.....
and i treat sis to eat the nicey ice cream i eat yesterday......
yumyum.....

23rd oct sun
din went to church again this wk......
cos have to go for diagnostic test at kumon....
my teacher is so friendly.....
haha....
quite funny lah....
my sis took the test and finished it in her first attempt.....
and ms gan let her start at lvl EI for her eng.....
as for me, this dumb sis.....
i could not finish my maths....
and a lot of qns is wat i learn in sec 4.....
but i forgot how to do le.....
then ms gan let me do pri 5 one....
haha....guess i am tt poor in maths....
i think tt no one believes tt i got A for both A and E maths lor......
and i have to start fr lvl A for maths.....
which is like one digit plus one digit......
i really diao lor.....
engwise, i could not do my first paper.....
cos it was too dificult....all lit stuff....
so i went on to a lower lvl.....
i dun wanna be at the same lvl as my sis,
so i did the paper one lvl higher than her....
but i still could not do the last page....
hehe....and ms gan decide to let me start at lvl FI for my eng.....
i have 2 days to clear my lvl A maths.....
jia you!!!

24th oct mon
cleared my lvl A maths.....
but failed my last paper (A191 - A200)
cos i made 5 mistakes....
may have to redo tt tml.....

25th oct tues
today is my first lesson at kumon....
maths cw: A191, B1 , AT lvl A
eng cw: FI 1
ms gan is so nice to us......
she is really patient in teaching us step by step wat to do when we come for class....
if i din forget,this is wat we have to do:
1. take off shoes
2. write time in
3. wash hand with disinfectant
4. take folder fr the cupboard
5. do cw (have to listen to cd for eng)
6. mark cw (for my low lvl maths)
7. record results in record book
8. fill in the 'my goal' form for eng
9. pack hw whenever got free time
10. write the dates for hw
11. stamp hw for maths
12. sweep the table
13. wriite time out
14. wear shoes (fei hua)
15. go home
hope i din forget anything impt...... :)
i wanna try the flashcards.....
but dunno got chance or not.....
hope i got the chance to play with it.....
yupps...

and cannot forget,
need to go back on sat to collect my cd.....
and hand in my hw....

26th oct wed
did nothing but maths.....
hated subtraction but muz clear it as fast as possible.....
or else i cannot proceed to higher lvl maths.....

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

this is the longest blog ever.....
haha....
ok lah.....tired le.....
tml have to work....
and do maths....
so muz go orh orh liao.....
signing out....

2005-10-15T00:23:00.000+08:00

[mood] tired
[listening] shou le dian shang - Ah sang
[thinking] slp
[doing] yawning
[quote] " money is impt "

went to my ah ma house today.....
with mummy and sis.....
aft tt went to chinatown for some shopping.....
wanna buy some clothes but din see anything i like.....

in the end we ended up in west mall....
then i bought a skirt for myself....
is my sis choose for me de....

sometimes i juz think tt life alone is much more enjoyable than life with frenz.....
at least when i am alone,
i dun have to qian jiu others....
i dun have to care abt wat they think....
or wat they say.....

anyway,
have to slp now....
or else tml cannot wake up on time for work....
*yawnz*

2005-10-13T15:59:00.000+08:00

[mood] sianzation
[listening] ru guo de shi - Fan Weiqi and Zhang Shaohan
[thinking] nothing
[doing] preparing for work
[quote] " life is juz so sianz during the hol "

preparing to go to work now....
so sianz....
haiz....

2005-10-12T23:08:00.000+08:00

[mood] ok
[listening] yi bi yi - fan wei qi
[thinking] tml's work
[doing] slacking?blogging?
[quote] "ppl always wish for a long break when they dun have one, and wish to work when they were having a long break"

went imm today.....
did nothing there....
juz pei my mummy shop shop a while.....
was really sianz.....

tml have to work.....
as usual....
then sms and wish shiqi jie jie happy birthday today.....
intended to ask her out but....
she din reply me!
haiz, or mayb she dun wanna meet me or wat....
since when i have offended her? *thinking*
no wat....
weird....
haiz....
seems like my sec frenz are all so far away from me.....
juz want to meet them once a while also so difficult.....
i dun blame those who are having a's.....
hmmm.....mayb there aren't any frenz for life ba.....

juz suddenly rmb ms joyce hong is coming back in dec.....
wah....nagging sia.....
sure one lor....
since i sometimes pon church.....
haha....aiya.....
lucky she coming back for hol onli.....
phew..... :P

*yawnz*

2005-10-11T02:01:00.000+08:00

[mood]happy
[listening]guardian angel-Hong Junyang
[thinking]of my hair
[doing]chatting on msn
[quote]"money is not everything, but no money = nothing"

did my hair today....
haha....
feels weird tt my hair is so short now.....
base colour is brown, highlight red and blonde.....
like the colour a lot.....

thanks, Ernest!!!(my hair stylist)

the onli bad thing is now i am broke....
haha....
it cost me 266 bucks....

2005-10-10T03:20:00.000+08:00

[mood] Sleepy
[listening] Si lu - Liang Jing Ru
[thinking] Nothing
[doing] Church stuffs, ppt for Christmas Concert
[quote] "Enjoy when u r relaxing, even though the time is short"

Finally finish dealing with the templete of this blog.....
spent me 2 hrs....

as usual,a day spent in church.....
and sang .....
a nice song indeed....
but so ke xi,the guys came in at the wrong time.....
mayb they see pastor lee then become so stress....
haha....

aft tt was the choir meeting.....
as expected, mostly on the xmas concert.....
me see shujun so kelian,
so decide to help her with the typing and stuff....
me will be busy with typing of eng lyrics this few wks....
haiz...there goes the rest of my hol....
and i face a prob,
some lyrics are in chinese,
do i need to translate them? or wat?
nah....dun care la....
type finish the rest first.....

nov onwards muz chiong liao.....
got attachment at Tan Tock Seng.....
wed got choir prac.....
thurs and mayb mon got to work....
wah...i might as well move to stay at Tan Tock Seng....
haha.....

aft the meeting,sis leona sent me to Yew Tee Mrt....
on the way, she bought some food....
or i should say,she bought LOTS OF food....
and stuffed me with it....
me feel so puffed up now.....
like a balloon....
haiz...there goes my plan of trying to slim down.....
but anyway.....
had a good time relaxing and chatting with her in her car.....
i must say that she said things tt made a lot of sense.....
or should i say tt i am young and i dun wish to think so much?
hmm......

*yawnz*
me slpy liao....
logging out.....

2005-10-09T01:01:00.000+08:00